This is a poem that I wrote for my three children before they were placed in my home for adoption. While the adoption failed after 3 years with us, my love and prayers for them remain constant.
I do not expect you to love right away
Or even to feel the desire to stay
When you lie in your bed I won’t ask you to say
Lord thanks for the way I was brought here today
Does it hurt when you cringe as I draw you near?
Do you crave the love you so painfully fear?
My child does it scare you when I shed a tear
For the loss you have suffered to bring you here?
When in anger you threw the toys down on the floor
Stomped down the hallway and slammed the door
Reminded me less of a child than a boar
Did you think I wouldn’t want you anymore?
Though you push me away with all of your might
Break our things, hit your friends, and give me a fright
Grasp for control and hold on tight
Still I will stay by you for I know it is right
At night when you’re lonely as you could be
Frightened of things in your dreams you will see
Will you turn to the one I love? – Jesus is He
Right beside you through all of your life He will be
Years from now as you look back on our care
Will you be able to say, “yes the Lord’s love was there”?
Will the years in our home help you to bear
The life that so often seemed terribly unfair?
When you grow will you know of the depth of the love
That permeated your life from above?
Of God the shepherd seeking His little lost sheep
And leading you home; forever to keep
God loves you, and so do I.
