The pain and dizziness continue to the extreme, but I did go in to the doctor this week at the advice of my therapist. I spent several hours Monday at the doctor’s, and getting blood work, x-rays, etc. to find out the cause of all of these issues, and then returned to the doctor on Tuesday.
The good news is that all of my tests came back “very good.” I don’t have any infections or health concerns, but he believes all of this is caused by the antidepressants. I have tried to express in the past how I always get bad side effects from medication, and here I am again.
I knew this when I was started on the pills, but when I shared this concern with psychiatrists in the past, they have never called me back. So I agreed this time… but I regret it now. Though I am very glad to know that I am not really sick, it sure feels that way. It isn’t like any of these symptoms are fake, and the coming off is even worse than the side effects going on (which were bad enough that I couldn’t continue even if I wanted to.)
Now I am sure, however, that if they are going to help me, it has to be drug free. This is too much for me to go through again, and even now that I am off of them, I am afraid of how long it is going to take for me to heal from this. I have already been lying on the couch for a month, and I can’t even think clearly enough to want to do something else.
If that is the treatment for my severe anxiety and depression, I would rather learn to live with those disabilities than to continue on this path. My husband and I both agree that the best treatment for me seems to be in the way of sensory therapy, and lifestyle accommodations.
Anyway, I apologize that my writing hasn’t been great lately. When I can’t think, it becomes really hard to write. Hopefully soon my head will clear, and I will be able to share my thoughts once more.