As has been true the rest of this week (and the weeks before that, if I remember correctly) it is now afternoon, and this is the first thing on my ‘list’ that I have even begun to do. The list is my own, and doesn’t require accountability to anyone else, but I like having it. The ‘list’ is the bare minimum that I want to accomplish each day. If I finish it, the day was okay. If I do more (which doesn’t happen often, as my energy is so low) I feel the day was productive. This is my list:
- Devotionals. I have a daily devotional, as well as a prophecy news guide sent to my email each day. Above reading that, I read at least 1-2 chapters of my Bible each day. Right now, I have recently completed a reading that took a bit more than a year, and am back to Exodus. I like the stories. It takes me longer to read directions and laws and such.
- Spanish. I am studying Spanish on the site Duolingo. I try to do at least 2 exercises each day, but only 1 on Sundays. I like learning Spanish, and have taken courses in the past. I am not great at learning languages. My son is much better. He is studying German on the same site, and probably speaks to me in German as much as English – that I don’t understand what he is saying most of the time encourages him more. Such humour!
- Blog Post. Right now I write one post each day, for six days a week. If I am really inspired, I will write another, and schedule it for future release. I am currently writing my posts a week in advance. It helps calm me to be so far ahead, though I know the summer is coming fast, and I will likely be away for a couple of weeks at some point. I really need to get working on that. Sometimes I think I should write as much, but I am compulsive that way.
- Musical Keyboard. Again, I am not great at learning this. It takes me so much time to read the notes that I can’t do it while I am playing. I write the letters above to help me out. For about 6.5 years I was practicing on the same 5-6 songs, plus some from the recorder books, which are easier. In the last two months, I have added another two songs. I guess for me that is really good. I could never play at church, but I like playing at home, and my cat seems to enjoy it!
- Cleaning. Some days I will clean for a few hours. Most days just a few minutes. I like cleaning, but I haven’t much energy, and I tend to perseverate on something (often sedentary) and struggle late into the afternoon in the fight to get something done. Still, I think I keep up pretty well. Even a little bit each day for six days a week can make a big difference. If I was working (from experience I know) I wouldn’t do as much cleaning in a month as I now do in a week – and I would feel it. This is okay.
Only I have been spending my mornings, and into the early afternoons, perseverating on research. Don’t get me wrong, I am really enjoying it. But my conscience is constantly tugging at me saying, ‘get something done!’ Of course, I am doing something. I am researching food options for myself, and I am accomplishing a lot!
Today, for instance, I made vegan mayonnaise. It was so simple, and so good!!! I can’t tell you how pleased I am. Especially since I have been allergic to eggs so long (bad for the last 15 years) and haven’t been able to have it. I missed it so much. I did try Veganaise, and I liked it okay – though my stomach, not so much – but it is really expensive. The mayo I made today was so much cheaper than even the real stuff, and I like it a lot! I think I may even use it in place of sour cream (I know, I shouldn’t be eating that, but I really like it – especially for taco salad or vegan chili.)
So far, I have still completed my list each day, and once I have, I feel ‘settled.’ Until then, however, I am in a battle with my own mind, trying to break away from whatever it is I am fixated on, and get something done. Even then, it doesn’t last long, and I may spend an hour or two total on my ‘list’ – even though I very much enjoy those activities, and the rest of the day I am perseverating.
But it sure does feel good to have the time to do that!