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Autism: If Only

I watched a movie the other night.

It was an Adam Sandler movie, which was listed on Netflix. Typically, I don’t like Adam Sandler movies. I have nothing against him, it is just that comedy is not my thing. Mostly I don’t get it. I know it is supposed to be funny, but it just leaves me feeling nauseous. It isn’t him – it is comedy in general that I struggle with.

I do have a sense of humour. I do laugh when I find things funny. It is just… I don’t find most things funny that other people seem to. I have a different humour, I guess. Anyway, I tend to choose sad movies most of the time.

There were two movies of his that I liked though: One was ‘Bedtime Stories,’ and this one – “The Cobbler” was the other.

I enjoyed the movie very much, but… okay. My favourite movies I tend to like because I like the story, and the people, and the place, and they make me cry, and… basically I like everything about the movie. A lot of movies I like, however, it may be just one detail that I like about the show.

There are several shows I have liked because I liked the house it was shot in. Houses are a big one for me, and I love Victorians. In fact, I watch a lot of Paranormal shows because they are based in Victorian houses (apparently they are often thought to be haunted?!?) I love the houses, so while I may have some idea of what is going on in the movie, my focus is completely on the house.

“Did you like the movie?”

“Absolutely! I would love to live in that house!” (Forget the fact that it was haunted, or that someone was murdered there, or… I might not be able to sleep after, but… “What a great house!”)

A lot of things I watch are for ideas. Futuristic films, or Sci-Fi, or even post apocalyptic movies (those are some of my favourites!) Time travel, or fallout shelters, or sunflower farms… there is a lot of variety to what I watch because mostly I am in it for the details.

sunflower-garden

That was the case with this movie. The first few times I saw it advertised on Netflix, I ignored it. Adam Sandler = comedy = not something I would like. But then I was going through the recently added section, and without seeing the picture, I read the description of the movie: (something like: A cobbler is able to become his clients by wearing their shoes.) Perfect!

So I put the movie on, and for the idea I really enjoyed it. Fourth generation cobbler – what a thought! Imagine a world where we were raised knowing, and being trained, for the exact occupation we would spend our lives doing.

Maybe most people like the excitement of choosing their own careers, picking their own direction, being responsible for their own future… I don’t know. For me, however, I found a lot of peace in that idea. How wonderful it might have been to know exactly who I was, and where I was expected to go, and what I was expected to do, from childhood.

Perhaps I wouldn’t have succeeded there, either – but I imagine I would have been far less anxious about where I was supposed to be going, had I known at 5 what was expected of me. Now I am 40, and I still don’t know what I am supposed to be doing… if only.

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Autism: Benefits of My Own Space

There was a fun type of game going around Facebook for a while that said to open up your phone (I don’t have one) and click on the middle suggested word twenty times in a row. I was always tempted to try this, but since I had no phone, and my tablet was not near me at the time, I never got around to it – until today.

I am not sharing this on Facebook, but I found my result quite funny, and wanted to share it here. Keep in mind that I am neither fluent in Spanish, nor do I write in Spanish most of the time – but I must use the automated suggestions much more for Spanish than for English; I have been learning Spanish on Duolingo.com for a couple of years, though I got out of the habit nearly a month ago when my routine was changed, and I broke my streak. It is very easy for good habits to be broken for me, and very difficult to get back into them.

All that to explain what I wanted to share. The result of my ‘twenty suggested words’ was: “yo no rechazo a la gente que no tiene nada que ver con el tema de la compra de la casa de la abuela,” which means, “I do not reject people who have nothing to do with the issue of buying grandma’s house .“ (the “a la,” and the “de la” came up as single suggestions, and the phrase ended in “y” (and) so I left that off.

So I guess that is my new motto for life, “I do not reject people who have nothing to do with the issue of buying grandma’s house!” Funny. I laughed so loud, my son had to come up and see what was going on.

I don’t believe that was ever a phrase that I had to translate in my Spanish course, though it sounds like one they would have – like one I translated a lot in the beginning of the course, “Mis elefantes beben leche.” (My elephants drink milk.)

Speaking of Spanish, I am really enjoying being back in my own room. I sleep better, I wake up feeling better, and best of all, I am getting back into good routines.

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For instance, the first thing that came back after moving into the ‘pink room’ was that I started practicing my keyboard again (which I got out of when my brother in law stayed in that room last September.) I thoroughly enjoy it while I am practicing, and spend the rest of the time with worship songs playing through my head (for that is the book I am practicing from.)

Later that week, my husband bought me an ellliptical machine from the thrift store where he works. It is huge and bulky in our living room, and squeaks really loud when I am using it, but I love it! I use it in front of the TV while streaming documentaries on my Chromecast from Netflix. (Wow, there were a lot of words in that sentence that I never used up until a short time ago!)

I am walking my dogs again – though I admit that has so much more to do with the warmer weather than having my own room (it has been hovering just over 0 Celcius this week as opposed to the -10 to -15 Celcius we have had far too long this winter.) Even Clara walked today as the roads were nearly dry for the first time since about November.

Best of all, I am dreaming again. Being in my own room means I can be (pretty much) on my own schedule. It isn’t so much that I am up later than him or anything, but that I am not wondering every moment when he will come in and watch me until I am finished with what I am doing. (Maybe I just felt watched – I always do when someone is near me, but still…) so I am able to focus entirely on what I am doing, and transition on my own terms.

This was a really good move for me!

 

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