There were any number of topics I could have chosen to write about today. Inspiration has been flowing through me for the last little while, and already I am several days ahead of myself with my posts, but my contact broke today.
A little under two years ago, I decided to try reusable gas permeable contact lenses in place of disposables. I was quite proud of myself for getting through the adjustment period – which was torture!
Truly, it felt like jagged pieces of plastic sitting on my eyeball, and every time I blinked, they would move and hurt. I wondered for those weeks how this couldn’t be damaging my eyes, but I had read that this type was healthier than disposables, and so I pushed through.
At the end of the adjustment period, with the exception of times when I got dust in my eyes, I liked my GP lenses so much better than my disposables.
My sight was clearer, they were much more comfortable, the cost was less, and I could look between distances without getting dizzy and unfocused. I really liked them.
However, in order to not revert to the pain of those first weeks, I had to wear them nearly every day. Some days I would only wear them for a few hours, and others for the entire day, but I couldn’t go more than a day or two in between without them becoming uncomfortable.
And then today, as I was washing the lens prior to inserting it, it broke. I don’t think I pressed hard on it or anything, but I have had them for a while, and I guess it just became fragile.
As I would have to go to the ophthalmologist for both an eye exam and a contact lens fitting, both of which are very expensive, before I could even order a new pair, I guess I will just stick with my glasses. I can’t afford the appointments at this time, and it would be weeks before my contacts would be in… I am not ready to be tortured again.
Although this frees me from having to wear them every day, it also makes me sad. I really could see so much better with these lenses – especially in my right eye, which has astigmatism. I could see stars better than at any other time since I was a teenager. I could see distances which my glasses do not allow.
Glasses, which only work in a certain line of sight, make me dizzy. Disposable contact lenses, which only adjust for distance, also make me dizzy when I look at things that aren’t quite so far away – and they were also not as good at correcting my vision.
It seems unless I am willing to go for laser surgery, or endure the struggle of adjusting to gas permeable lenses again, there is no real solution to my vision issues, and I almost want to cry.
autismalifetimeundiagnosed 